U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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