i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize