what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
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I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
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I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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