remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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