my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
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I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
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So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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