Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
why do cheetos always look like penises
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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