yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize