She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
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You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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