You just made me feel so damn special
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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