Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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