Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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