Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
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Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
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I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
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