remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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