She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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