woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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