Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize