Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize