This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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