i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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