i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize