hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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