and she was petting her beer can
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize