girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
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We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
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He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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