I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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