I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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