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I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
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