So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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