Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize