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I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
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