i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize