D3 body, D1 cock
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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