she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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