i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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