If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
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Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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