We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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