When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
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Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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