I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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