I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
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In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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