i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize