just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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