i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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