you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Hippo gnu deer
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I believe in your delicious
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize