Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
wow bdsm is so cute
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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