6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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