hotel room ftw
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize