I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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