you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize