his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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