Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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