I threw up into my coffee this morning.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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